Waiting From Afar

Waiting From Afar
C/P,   K/D, P/T
PG-13 - NCC-17
Declaimer: I don't own or make money, Paramount does, I'm just taking them out for some fun in the sun.
Summary: Someone waiting from afar.
Italic writing is for someone POV
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Chakotay's POV
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He free again, I've been waiting from afar for him, since I  first saw him in Sandrines, the real Sandrines in Paris France that is.
They're fighting again, why does he put up with her? She always belittling him in front of others and he never says anything, it came to a head in the mess hall, they had to call in Security yet again.
Ken Dalby told me about it later that day, he was there when it happened, he was sitting with Tom, when B'Elanna started ranting at him over some stupid thing, I think the crew actually saw another side to her when she hit him, they had heard the rumors, saw the bruises but they never believed what he was going through.
Till that day, they never witnessed her hitting him for no reason before, thank god Ken was with him and was able to hold her off of Tom, till Tuvok's security team lead by Greg Ayala arrived.
Now this, all of his gear has been thrown out of their shared quarters, into the corridor, she just threw everything out of their quarters. Harry had commed me about it, between Ken and Harry they keep me abreast with what happening in Tom's life, they know that I love Tom.
Yes it's a shock and I hope one day I can tell him, between Harry and Ken, they pick his stuff up so that Tom wouldn't be greeted with the sight when he got off his shift, she waited for him to be on duty before throwing his gear out and now I have the job of finding him some quarters, I wish he'd move in with me, to soon for that though. Tom had given up his quarters when he moved in with her, if you ask me that was the worse mistake he ever made, don't get me wrong, B'Elanna one of my friends but becoming lovers was totally wrong for both of them, they're too much alike, they run and hide when a problem arises, they both need someone who can handle them and their problems, they both had unhappy childhood's and both have low self esteem, sure they both hide it from everyone, to well if you ask me, but if you know what to look for you can see it, they were looking for love in all the wrong places as the saying goes.
Take Tom for instant when he had to do time in the brig, for helping that blasted water planet, after his release he went into hiding, pushing everyone away but between Harry and Ken. They manage to drag him out of his quarters three weeks later, he still not talking to Kathryn, not that I blame him, he refuses to talk about it or any other bad thing from his past, he just buries it and then when he came out of hiding he makes out nothing wrong, and one day it's going to blow up in his face.
Now B'Elanna, when she found out that all the Maquis were dead she went and started hurting herself, taking the safeties off dangerous hologram programs nearly getting herself killed or seriously hurt.
Don't get me wrong I know that people have different ways of coping and many work but not their way of coping, it was heading to a major blowup and one or the other was going to get hurt, most likely Tom, so someone had to step in and defuse the bomb but it was too late to save the relationship, we all knew that but they were both too stubborn to do anything about it.
You see, Tom's well known as a flirt and been known to bed hop from one bed to another but when he enters a relationship, he remains faithful, but people let his past and reputation of a whore stand in the way of helping him. Oh yes I've heard what they call him even to this day they still call him names like Voyager's whore or slut but that doesn't stop them from using him for sex, if people told the truth they'd know that Tom only slept with people for company and had sex with very few, the rest were forced, people forced my beloved to have sex with them at the beginning of our journey home but I put a stop to that once I found out, they still taut him but the beatings had stopped.
Sitting here in the Mess hall eating whatever Neelix gave me to eat that passed for dinner or lunch, depending on what shift you were on, if you didn't look at what you ate, it was safe to eat but no matter what you did the taste of whatever it was could and would throw anyone for a loop.
I felt rather than saw him, he entered with Dalby, I'm glad that he had a protector in Dalby he needed one, Ken and Tom had grown up together, before Dalby family moved to the outer regions of Federation Space. I watched as he gathered up some Green slop for lunch and joined Ken and Harry, who had entered ten minutes before, just before getting to their table, I spotted someone leg spring out from under the table to trip him as he started to regain his balance he had been push from behind, jumping up from my own table, I rush to his side hoping to defuse any tempers that would spring up.
Ken and Harry had gotten to Tom's side before I did, I noticed the hard looks Ken gave to O'Brien, one of Tom's main tormenters, Keith O'Brien and Ken were sworn enemy, O'Brien was as 'fleet as you could get, he was a total asshole to anyone who was Maquis but me and B'Elanna, I don't blame him for leaving her alone, I would as well if I was him, another and one of the rumors that were floating around and I quite believe, is that he has a crush on her. I guess being CO saves me from that grief but my people get it in spades, Tom gets it even worse than they do, from both sides at first but once I got with the program, my people stopped, well they stopped the attacks but not the words.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Bending down, Chakotay ask, "Are you alright?"
Chakotay offered his hand to help him, when Tom shook his head, "I think, I need to go to Sickbay Commander."
Concerned Chakotay lower himself to his knees and slowly turned the younger man over, gasping at what greeted him, mingling with the green goo was bright red blood, looking at the tray Tom had been holding, he could see broke glass and remains of what use to be a plate, numbly staring back down at Tom only to find that he was out cold, calling out, "Computer Medical emergency, two to beam directly to sickbay."
"Acknowledged."
Chakotay felt the familiar tingle as the Transporters locked him and materialize in Sickbay calling out, "Computer activate EMH.
"Please state. . ." Cutting off half way through when he spotted Tom laying on the floor with the Commander kneeling beside him, rushing forward barking, "What happen?"
Helping the Doctor to get Tom up onto a Bio Bed, he told him "He fell in the Mess hall and landed on his tray."
"Likely excuse Commander." The Doctor pulled a medical tricorder out and begun to scan their chief pilot.
Frowning at what he was saying, Chakotay wondered what the hell he on about, "But that what happen, I saw it with my own eyes."
Making a rude noise the Doctor asked, "Let me guess, he had a helping hand in falling?" Commander could hear him muttering, "I need to remove the glass from his body and replace the blood he's lost," Pausing as he worked, "He'll be fine but he'll needs to rest for a couple of days and as soon as he wakes up he can leave but he can't stay on his own."
"I'm sure Ken and Harry will stay with him."
"Is that a joke Commander? Ken and Harry Dalby-Kim would let him do as he wished."
"Ken wouldn't."
"Oh yes he would, I know that Harry and Ken Dalby-Kim are his friends but Tom really need to rest, he lost a lot of blood would B'Elanna take time off work to keep him in line?"
At his remark Chakotay snorted, "He'd be right back in here within the hour if you did that Doc. Besides they are no longer together anymore, B'Elanna gave Tom his walking papers."
"That's just typically, I'm the last to know again." If the EMH could worry he would have, "I need to place him somewhere, you know what he's like when he has to stay here and I wish to avoid that but it looks like he staying here."
With a long suffering sign, Chakotay knew that this was his prefect chance, if he blew it now he knew that he'd never get another chance to talk to Tom, before he knew it he volunteered himself to see to Tom's care, "I'll see that he gets his rest, even if I have to sit on him."
"You don't have to go that far Commander," As an after thought he asked, "Are you sure Commander?"
"I'm sure, I can only think of two people or three who can handle Tom, Ayala would but they haven't spoken since coming out here, Tuvok but Tom would try anything to just get any emotions out of him, as you know he has made it a goal in life to get him to smile or laugh, I think Neelix and Tom have joined forces in that mission, so Tuvok would most likely give him the pinch every time he got annoyed with Paris, he'd get his rest but he's also take a swing at him, so that leave me or the Captain but they're still not talking, unless it involve work. So that leave me and he'll test my patience's but I can handle him without losing my temper." At the Doctor nod I ask, "When will he be released?"
"As soon as he wakes up, go and make your report and I'm Comm you when he wakes up." Turning to leave, the Doctor called out, "Oh and Commander?" Once he was sure he had Chakotay attention he told him, "Take it easy on him and good luck."
Turning stunned at what he had heard seeing the Doc smile at him, he begun to wonder if everyone knew he wanted Tom, he nodded his thanks and left.
Heading back to the Mess hall hoping to catch Ken and Harry still there, entering he noticed that they were along with Tuvok and Janeway, who looked like she was in bitch mode, barking orders left and right and she had cornered Dalby, he really hoped that Ken was able to keep a grip on his temper, there was no love lost between the two of them since Ken started dating Harry then she refused to marry them, so they came to him asking if he'd marry them, since he officially still held his rank of captain, though it took a lot for Janeway to agree to that part of it, she didn't agree that Chakotay was still a captain in his own right before they joined forces with Voyager, Chakotay had found out later, another reason why she kicked up such a fuss and then later refused to marry them, was because she fancied Harry herself but Chakotay thought of another reason was because Ken turned her down flat one night when she had drunk to much wine, Ken had told him that she had literally threw herself at him at the beginning of their trek home.
Hoping to rescue his friend from her clutches, he didn't noticed that Tuvok was approaching him from the other side of the room till he said, "Commander Chakotay can you tell me what you saw?"
His focus on Ken and Janeway broken, he faced the Vulcan, explaining to Tuvok what he had witness.
"And then what did you do Commander? Tuvok asked with disdain edging into his tone.
Glaring the Vulcan asking, "What do you mean?"
"I simply wish to know what you did next Commander?"
"I had Tom beamed to Sickbay to be treated for his injuries Commander." Chakotay replied with sarcasm dripping from his tone of voice, "What would you do Mister Vulcan?"
In monotone Tuvok stated, "I'd assess the damage and if it warranted it I'd beam him or have the Doctor come to the Mess Hall."
"Well I assess and felt that it warranted a beam out."
"Commander I have no idea why you're getting riled up about."
"I'm getting riled up as you call it because you have the compassion of a rock, one crew member was injured and you haven't even bothered to ask how he is." Without another word Chakotay charged off, heading towards Ken and Ayala.
Throwing himself into a chair beside Ayala, saying, "God that man is enough to drive me batty."
Nodding Ken as he watched the rest of the room an old habit that never left him from the Maquis days, "How Tom?"
Rubbing his hand over his face Chakotay told them, "Doc says that he's going to be Ok, once awake he able to leave but not to be on his own."
Ken nodding they all knew how Tom hated anything that faintly resembles a hospital reminded to much of his past and they didn't what him remembering anything of that if they could help it. Ken remember some of the visits vividly from their boyhood days.
Ken stated, "I'll get him when he wakes up then."
Chakotay shook his head saying, "No you're not, I am. Doc's orders."
Flabbergasted Ken repeated, "I'm not? You are? Doc's orders?"
With a grin Chakotay explained, "It seems that a certain couple lets Tom do as he likes, when he meant to be resting and the Doc insist that this time, Tom will follow orders if he stayed with me."
Dalby snorted, "Good luck, that all I can say in that matter Chakotay, cuz you're gonna need it. Saying no to Tom is like trying to wean Janeway off her coffee, it's impossible."
Chakotay grinned as he said, "Wanna bet that I can get Tom to do as he told?"
Ken yelped, "No way, I'd lose that bet right away."
"You sure would." Chakotay replied at him with a grin.
Ayala mumbled, "Heads up."
Chakotay glanced up and saw Keith O'Brien heading pass with Tuvok and Janeway.
O'Brien saluted them as he walked passed them, "Later."
Janeway glanced over at the three men as she passed them saying, "Commander I wish to speak to you when you have a spare moment please."
Chakotay nodded, not trusting his mouth at that moment, to say he was fierce was an understatement, he was glad that she knew to give him some time to calm down before talking him.
Watching with hooded eyes as O'Brien smirked at them as he passed them, Chakotay felt his ire go up another notch. Under his breath, he told his friends, "I hope one day he winds up as dead as a door nail."
Ayala placed a hand on his friend shoulder, "Be careful what you say, one day it might happen and they'll all point the finger at you for saying those words."
"Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything stupid or order it, so if anything does happen to the prick it won't be because of me."
"That good to hear, cuz people need you around here."
"Sickbay to Commander Chakotay, please come to sickbay, your change is now awake and rearing to go, please take him off my hands."
Chakotay signed, "I'm on my way, Chakotay out."
Looking over at his friends when he heard one of them snicker, he noted that they were finding it rather amusing that he would be dealing with Tom this time, "Ha, ha very funny laugh it up now gentleman, remember that pay back is hell."
With that Chakotay strolled out of the Mess hall and headed for Sickbay.

Waiting From Afar 2
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Tom woke up with a groan as he found himself lying yet again in sickbay, closing his eyes again,  whispering just in case the Doc was close by, "What happened this time?
"Ahh Mister Paris I see you have decided to join the waking world."
Moving to sit up swinging his legs over the side, he asked, "What happened?"
Watching as the Doc ran a tricorder over him to check if everything was working the way it should, asking again, "Doc what happened?"
"What do you remember?"
Swinging his legs as he sat there thinking but nothing came to mind, looking back up at the Doctor with worry clouding his eyes, "I don't remember what happened."
Frowning the Doc checked his readings again saying, "You didn't hit your head, what the last thing you remember?"
"I was heading to the mess hall to met Harry, I caught up with Ken at the door and we got some food, and that it's."
"Hmm I have no explanation for this lost of memory, let me run some more scans."
Sitting dejectedly Tom nodded his consent.
Buzzing about sickbay to gather what he needed to perform the test the Doc was soon back at Tom's side, "Please lie back down Lieutenant."
Swinging his long limbs back onto the bed he laid down and closed his eyes as he waited for the Doctor to finish the tests he needed.
Nodding to himself, as he watched Tom close his eyes, it was a quirk of Tom's whenever he did come to sickbay if he had to lie down he'd close his eyes refusing to watch.
Once he started working the Doctor noticed that Tom relaxed as he usually did, he damn the Captain to hell and back for locking down Tom's medical files, he needed to know what Tom went through in prison and most likely his childhood, he was guessing a lot from what he could see from others examinations he had to do, Tom had many broken bones for someone his age and a lot of old scar tissues, dermal regenerators were only good for healing the skin surface not removing the scars that appear in bones and skin tissue.
Tom listened as The Doctor ran his test humming and haring over the readings while he remained still, Tom tried again to remember what happened.
Getting flashes all jumbled of what he thought happened mixed into it for good measure were some rather unpleasant memories.
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'Thomas Eugene Paris just what do you think you're doing?'
Five year old Tom stood before his father trying real hard not to brawl, beside him stood his father favorite vase laid shattered at his feet.
Admiral Owen Paris Third from the top of Starfleet stood glaring down at his five year old son pointing towards his office saying, 'Be ready.'
Sobbing Tom walked to his father office with his father's eyes glaring at his back as he entered his office.
Entering his office letting his eyes roam over his son disappointment written over his face saying, 'Why do you disobey me Thomas? You bring this onto yourself, do you think I enjoy this?'
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'Stop fighting traitor it'd be easier if you just let us have your whoring ass.'
'Fuck you.'
'Nah never in a million years slut.'
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Feeling hands in the small of his back Tom felt himself falling then all he felt was pain as something pierced his stomach.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Shaking his self out of his memories Tom sighed as he fought the urge to scream or to be sick, the urge to be sick won out moaning, "Doc I'm gonna be sick." Tom bolted off the bed pushing the Doc out his way and dashed into the sickbay bathroom.
Chakotay entered sickbay to the sounds of someone being sick looking about with a frown he was hoping it wasn't a set back for Tom, spotting the Doctor talking through the door he overheard him saying, "Tom please unlock the door and let me in."
Chakotay heard a muffled reply from Tom, moving closer Chakotay decided to help the Doctor out by saying, "Is there a problem here Doctor?"
Chakotay hid his smirk when he heard Tom cursed loud enough for them to hear.
Two seconds later the door slid open revealing a rather pale and sweating Tom Paris leaning rather heavily against the door frame, losing his grip Tom stumbled out of the door landing onto his knees with a groan, "Gonna be sick again." Pressing his lips together and placing a hand over his mouth to stop the flow Tom jumped to his feet again to stumble back in to the bathroom, falling to his knees Tom made it to the toilet bowl in time to bring up the remaining contents of his stomach.
While the Doctor reached for his gear Chakotay entered the tiny room grabbing a cloth out of the cupboard pulling out the sink so that the water flowed into the bowl, dipping the cloth into the water,  wringing out the access water, Chakotay moved closer to Tom, kneeling down beside the blonde man, Chakotay ran the cloth over his heated face and neck as Tom dry heaved into the bowl.
Feeling miserable Tom leant his forehead against the bowl with a groan feeling hot he felt a cool cloth wipe his heated skin with a sign of pleasure, "Mmmm that feels good."
Lifting his head Tom tilted it till his neck was exposed Chakotay getting the hint ran the damp cloth across the front.
Shifting a bit to accommodate his growing groin at the sigh of a flushed, excited Tom Paris wishing that it was him giving Tom that pleasure and not some wet cloth.
Shifting back Tom came into contact with a solid chest moving till he was flush again the solid mass Tom rested his head against Chakotay shoulder with a sigh of pleasure.
By then the Holodoc who had been watching the Commander and pilot interact together, he knew that the Commander main concern about starting anything with Tom was that he was unsure if Tom returned his feelings but the Doc knew that Tom loved Chakotay but wasn't sure how to act around him. Tom had admitted to him that Chakotay reminded him somewhat of his father and that scared him, that the closest he ever came to admitting that his father had hurt him.
Moving closer to the men he ran a medical tricorder over Tom reading the readout asking, "Tom what happen?"
Reluctantly Tom moved away from the warmth of the Commander body rocking on his heels he looked up at him then back at Chakotay not sure how much he could reveal to them.
Chakotay watched in silent as Tom looked between him and the Doctor, he could read the uncertainly in Tom's blue orbs, fighting his urge to take the young man into his arms, feeling that the right thing to do was leave so that Tom could talk to the Doctor alone once he came to that conclusion Chakotay stood up throwing the cloth into the sink saying, "I'll wait outside for you."
Tom watched as Chakotay walked out before he left Tom called out, "No."
Slowly turning repeating, "No?"
"Stay please?" Tom pleaded.
Moving back to the man that held his heart, he could never deny Tom of anything, holding out his hand saying, "You'll be more comfortable in the main room than in here."
Reaching out Tom gripped Chakotay offered hand and haul himself up onto his feet giving himself time to overcome any dizziness, he noticed that Chakotay hadn't released his hand, with a slight smile he nodded to let him know that he was ready to move.
Feeling a flush of heat climbing to his cheeks, Chakotay was glad that it didn't show bright red like Tom's did, he noticed that Tom lower his head to hide his blush making his smile grow even bigger.
Following behind the two men The Doctor smiled knowing that in time they would become what they both desire and he'd help them in anyway possible, Tom happiness meant everything to him. Tom was the first to treat him as a friend sure they had their tiffs most people think they hate one another but that was furthest than the truth it was just the way they wish to be. Tom was his friend and he was Tom's, even when they bicker like old biddies it was all apart of their friendship.
Chakotay lead Tom to a bio bed and helped him up when Tom reached for his hand again and patted the space next to him saying, "Have a seat Commander."
Pushing himself upon the bed next to the blond god saying, "What happened Tom?"
Chewing on his bottom lip pondering how to begin, he felt Chakotay eyes on him looking over at him, he could see that Chakotay was worried, he had heard the rumors, that Chakotay really liked him but he wasn't sure if he should make a play for the big man, what with his run of bad luck with relationships he didn't what to hurt the big man feelings, when he found out about his past.
He knew what everyone said about him, that he hurt everyone he ever been in a relationship with, but not a mention of his feelings, when people used him for their own means, everyone who even thought of entering a relationship with him was warned that he'd hurt them but it was never mention that Tom never left them they always left Tom, once they got what they wanted from him whether it be his family connections or his body once his use was over he was dumped like yesterday rubbish.
Feeling somewhat uneasy as the silence drew out, Chakotay felt Tom tensing up next to him, looking over at the younger man saying, "Tom?"
Without lifting his head, Tom asked, "Chakotay can you honestly say that I've hurt people or used them for my own gain?"
Confused Chakotay wasn't sure how to answer so he asked, "What do you mean?"
Raising his head he quietly said, "What I mean is that I've heard what the others have said about me," Pausing to gather his wandering thoughts, Tom looked back at their joined hand asking,  "Am I that unlovable that they'd lie about me? What do I have to do for people to like me?"
Feeling as if his heart was tearing into two Chakotay gathered Tom into his arms saying, "I don't know Tom."

Waiting from afar 3
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Once Chakotay had Tom settled down for a nap in his bed, he unpacked Tom's bag that Harry had brought over earlier, placing his things into his draws while humming, once done he checked on Tom before moving out into the living area.
Moving to his desk Chakotay called up the file he had been reading finding the spot where he left off, running his fingers through his hair with a sign, sinking into his chair with a moan as he traced the cheek of the man that peered back at him from the screen, "How the hell am I going to control myself with you in my bed?"
As he stared into the bright blue eyes on the screen tapping his badge, "Chakotay to Janeway?"
"Janeway here."
"Captain can I see you tomorrow before my duty shift concerning what happened today?"
"Why not now?" she asked.
"I've got Paris here and he is asleep and I can't leave him alone."
"Why do you have him and not Ensign Kim?"
With a faint smile as he recalled the Doc's words when he asked the same thing, "The Doc felt that if Tom stayed with me, he'd get the rest he needs, it's come to his notice that when he stays with Harry or Ken he does as he pleases."
With a heartfelt smile she nodded saying, "Okay that will be fine, we'll met for breakfast then and discuss this matter."
"Usual time?"
"Yes that will do fine, how is Tom by the way?"
"He's asleep at the moment but with rest he'll bounce back like he usually does. Captain may I ask what happened with O'Brien?"
Chakotay watch her as she took a sip of what he guessed to be coffee, taking in her expressions, he guessed that nothing happened to him that he was given a slap on the wrist.
"Tuvok found that it was an accident, so nothing was done to Keith."
Chakotay frowned as he said, "There seems to be a bit of a run with accidents Captain and O'Brien seems to be always there."
"What are you implying Chakotay?"
Chakotay knew that Janeway wouldn't believe him when it concerned Keith O'Brien her new boyfriend, shaking his head as he replied, "Nothing, nothing at all."
"Make sure you're got some proof before you make accusations Commander. I know you have a history with Keith but remember you also have a history with Paris and all the sudden you're his buddy or should I say. . . ."
Chakotay cut in before she could finish, "That has nothing to do with this, now I'm going to sign off before either of us say something we'll both regret, Good night."
Without waiting Chakotay signed off cursing under his breath when he heard Tom say, "She right you know."
"About what?" Chakotay asked needing to hear the young man say it out aloud.
Slowly moving into the room Tom stood in front of the View port saying, "Our history is damning. Keith would throw it into my face and he'll keep bringing it up within your hearing. I know that you have feelings for me and I'm telling you, no I'm begging you not to act on them."
Moving closer Chakotay asked, "You'd prefer to be lonely for the rest of your life because of O'Brien and his pack?"
"You don't know what they would do to me."
"I won't let them harm you."
Shaking his head as he whispered, "They'll kill me if I even look at you sideways,"
Stunned Chakotay asked, "Why haven't you said anything?"
"Chakotay the first thing you learn when inside is to never be a squealer, the same rules applies in Starfleet and Maquis never squeal and they might just let you live."
Not sure what to say Chakotay decided to drop the matter before Tom became upset, everyone knew of Tom's past in prison it wasn't pretty nor was the beginning of the journey home any better, everyone took their anger for Janeway out on Tom, they felt that they couldn't touch her, so they went after Tom, himself included, he didn't bash or beat Tom but he kept Tom at arms lengths and since his love for the man had no where to go Chakotay let it out in anger making the man feel inadequate criticizing him at every turn, he was ashamed of his actions and with the help of a handful kept Tom as safe as they could.
Before either man could think of anything to say the door chimed, *Beebop*
Chakotay called out, "Enter."
As the door slid open Harry and Ken with Greg and Geron Tem on their heels stroll in, "Hey Tom and how it's hanging?" Ken asked as he threw himself onto the couch.
Watching in amusement Chakotay groused, "Sure Ken make yourself at home,"
Ken flipped back, "Thanks Capt I will."
Harry shook his head at his husband's antics since getting together with Ken he got to know some of the other Maquis the Commander being one of them and often witnessed the lighter side of him.
Watching from where he stood Tom smiled he knew what Ken was like since they have known each other for a long time but he had never joined them when they visited the Commander on their weekly dinner night.
Ken smiled at his friend saying, "Did we come at the wrong time?"
Greg shook his head as he sat beside his friend saying, "Ken put a sock in it."
"No can do not wearing any."
Geron giggled as he perched on the arm of the couch. Tom watched with a perplexed look on his face, deciding that he was intruding Tom wandered into the Commander bedroom, hoping that no one would noticed that he disappeared but whatever Gods were out there didn't listen, just as he was entering the room he heard Ken say, "Hey Tommy just where do you think you're going buddy?"
Turning and hoping that his face wasn't as red as he thought it was explained, "I'm not exactly dressed for company Ken."
Screwing up his face in laughter Ken tried to say, "Hell . . . . Bud. . . . you forget that . . .  . I've seen you with less clothes on than you have now?"
Blushing as he tried to hide the hurt, he knew he was being silly but he couldn't help it, "You may have Ken but they haven't and we were kids." Tom felt that he had to explain Ken statement as he noticed some interesting looks flying about the room.
Ken sobered up as he noticed that Tom looked hurt by his words, he knew that Tom hated talking about his past and he just threw in a diddly. "Ahh sorry Tommy."
Without a word Tom entered the room he knew that Ken would follow him that was just the way he was, he hated seeing him upset in anyway or form he was his protector for as long as Tom could remember.
Feeling arms slide around his waist he knew that it was Ken and if anyone entered they would have thought that they were lovers but Tom and Ken never crossed that line, Leaning back against the strong chest saying, "You know if Chakotay or one of them walked in they'd think that we're cheating on Harry."
"Nah they all know that we wouldn't do that and Harry knows that us two are close and we will always be close. There nothing he can do to change that Tommy but accept it."
Turning so he was facing his grinning friend saying, "You know you embarrassed me out there?"
"Yup I know, and you know that I'm really sorry right?"
"Yup I know."
Nodding Ken knew that the matter was dropped and never brought up ever again between them. Ken knew that Harry would never understand the sort of friendship they had, he knew that they loved each other but never slept together, they'd hug each other at a drop of a hat but they never kissed unless it was on the forehead or cheek, he also knew that Tom didn't have the same sort of relationship with any other than he did with Ken, even Harry and Tom's friendship was different, Tom never cuddled Harry, he'd give him a quick hug if the need arose but that was all.
Tom smiled at his friend saying, "Okay let go and liven that group out there shall we?"
Clasping his hand into Tom's saying, "That's the spirit Tommy boy."
Dragging his friend out of the room saying, "Ok what have we got planned for this night?" Dragging Tom over to Harry he sat Tom in the middle of Chakotay and Harry and sat down on Harry's lap with a grin.
Chakotay felt his face heat up once Tom's thigh brushed against his, jumping to his feet as if he had been burnt, he knew what exactly what Ken was doing, he never made attempts to hide it, he never had and never would, he wanted Tom and him together, and he'd do anything in his power to see that it happened.
Greg smirked as Chakotay jumped off the couch as soon as Tom settled in beside him, he also noticed the slight bulge he sported when he paused in front of him, Greg didn't make a habit of checking his friend's groin but since he was more or less standing right in front of him, he couldn't help eyeballing it.
Somewhat surprised at the sudden departure of Chakotay from his side, Tom knew that Ken was playing matchmaker again and Chakotay and he were his victims normally he wouldn't have minded but he had just warned the Commander not to get involve with him, glancing at his friend thinking, 'Have to have a little talk with Dalby about easing off the Commander, damn why though? Can't I just tell O'Brien to fuck himself? Nope Tommy boy no can do never in a million years.'

Waiting from afar 4
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Tom slowly woke and knew that he was alone, no one was in the cabin with him, moving slowly Tom edged his feet towards the floor slowly standing up with a groan. Not a morning person he wasn't sure what woke him up well apart from his full bladder moving towards the bathroom he idly wondered where Chakotay was.
Once he finished his business in the bathroom Tom headed back into the bedroom eyeing the bed debating whether he should crawl back into it and sleep, before he could decide the door chimed, "Computer who at the door?"
"Crewman Kenneth Dalby."
Calling out, "Enter." Tom moved into the living area as Ken entered.
Ken smiled as he entered calling out, "Tommy boy."
Leaning against the door frame Tom asked, "Ken and what do I own this pleasure?"
"Chakotay asked me to come over once you woke up, I had the computer to let me know when there was movement in here and hurried on over."
"Oh, he's with the captain right?"
"Sure is, damn shame that she won't do anything about Keith O'Brien, he's getting away with what he doing."
With a tight smile Tom replied, "There is no proof of what he doing, his word against mine and since he sleeping with the captain she would believe him over me."
With a knowing look Ken told him, "Damn shame she doesn't know about Gary then."
"Yeah it is and we're not telling her either, let her find out about Gary on her own."
"But it could solve all our problems Tommy."
"She won't believe us Kenny, Janeway would just doubt us and he'll lay low till she forgets about Gary and him." Explained Tom as he moved over to the table.
"Do you think Chak knows about Gary?"
"How am I to know Kenny? If he does I hope to hell he won't tell her."
Ken shook his head as he stared at his friend asking, "Why the fuck not Tommy?"
Closing his eyes as he tried to sort out the facts of why and try to explain it to his friend, "Cuz Kenny she needs to find out on her own, she won't believe anyone at all, he has her so twisted about his little finger it's not funny, he could tell her that Tuvok was an arranging a mutiny and she would believe him."
Shocked Ken stunk down into a chair saying, "We have to keep a close eye out for that."
Tom nodded as he rubbed his face, he felt his eyes water making a quick excuse he tried to dart off before his friend could notice, before he could even begin to move Ken caught his wrist stalling him, "Hey what really wrong Tommy?"
Watching as Tom's masks slide into place with a smirk as he said, "They don't work on me remember Tommy boy, I'm not the others I can see through them." Dragging the reluctant man over to the couch saying, "Tom talk to me."
Tom sighed as he sat down in the corner of the couch drawing up his legs as he stared at his long time friend, during that time he hadn't heard the door slide open as he said, "I'm confused Kenny, my feelings are all over the place and I just need to think."
Ken having seen Chakotay entered nodded at him as he asked, "Feelings about what Tommy?"
Licking his lips as he stared about the room shocked when he spied Chakotay by the door, "Commander." With that Tom lurched off the couch and into the bedroom.
Chakotay went to follow till Ken reached out grabbing his arm saying, "Leave him be for now."
Nodding Chakotay looked at the closed door of his room asking, "What happened?"
"Not sure and till I find out leave him, don't push him."
Concerned Chakotay turned so he faced the dark haired man asking, "And what if he doesn't talk to you?"
With a smug smile Ken told him, "He will trust me."
Doubt filled the older man's face as he replied, "You sound so sure Dalby? What have you got that no counselor in Starfleet got?"
"Ahh trade secret, Chak I can't tell you."
"It may come in handy in the future."
Shaking his head Dalby explained, "Nah it wouldn't, Tom wouldn't talk to anyone in that matter, you see the difference between them and me is that I care and they don't care and he knows that."
"We care and wish to help him."
"No they don't. Janeway might have before but not now and he confused as hell about you Cha and scared, I know he cares about you a lot but he's scared of what the crew especially the Maquis and that damn prick O'Brien think."
Tom had intended on taking the couch that night but fell asleep on top of the bed, while waiting for Ken to leave, he had overheard some of what they had talked about and knew that Chakotay was giving him the time as Ken had requested.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Tom groaned as he woke up hearing a noise out in the living area he got off of bed noticing the blanket that was laying in a mess at the foot of the bed, he knew that Chakotay or Ken had covered him up while he was asleep, padding towards the door pausing he listened to see if he could hear any voices when he didn't, he moved closer to active the door sensors stepping out into the living area Tom spotted Chakotay laying on the couch reading a real book, Tom smiled as he thought he was the only one who actually read a real book, he had a vast collection of them in his quarters and at home back on earth. Sitting down on the couch at Chakotay's feet, staring at the floor without saying a word.
Chakotay lowered the book without a word reaching over for his bookmark, placing it in between the pages to mark his place, laying the book on the floor he asked, "Sleep well?"
Nodding Tom looked up glancing at the book smiling as he read the cover he had read the book and owned a copy of it himself, "You like James Patterson?"
"Hell of a writer."
"Which series you like the best?"
"All, but I like Alex Cross right from the start."
"Me too, I've read all his books over and over again."
Nodding Chakotay watched as Tom leant back as they discussed what books they like frowning when Tom suddenly asked, "Do you know that Brian is cheating on the Captain?"
"With who?"
"Gary Anderson from Engineer."
"Why are you telling me?"
"Not sure why but I can't tell her, she won't believe me if I say anything."
"Would you like me to tell her?"
"Not sure, I have some proof to back you up."
"Is that why he giving you a hard time?"
"One of the reasons, I also know something else about him that would get me killed if I say anything."
Shocked Chakotay unsure what to say remained quiet as Tom said, "I can't tell you even though I really want to but it would harm you and Voyager if I told you. I can't involved you in this. I care to much about you to do that to you, that's the closest you're going to get to hearing me telling you that I have feelings for you. I can't risk entering a relationship with you not now maybe never no matter how much I would love to." Getting to his feet Tom walked into Chakotay's room and gathering his things with one last look about before he left.
Watching as Tom headed towards the door, just before it opened Chakotay said, "You're not alone anymore. I'm not giving up on you Tom, this is far from over."
Lowering his head Tom hid his smile dropping his things he turned saying, "I know."
Getting to his feet Chakotay moved giving Tom time to move away him when he stood in front of him saying, "I'm not letting you go Tom, trust me." Chakotay raised his arms, holding them out wide he pleaded, "Trust me, I won't hurt you."
Licking his dry lips as he stared into his eyes finding what he was looking for he moved into his arms without a word.
Signing in relief Chakotay wrapped his arms about the slim form smiling as he felt Tom slipping his arms about him, he felt Tom's tears as they soaked his shirt, he knew that it was going to be a battle but they would make it through to the end stronger than before.